Tuesday, February 02, 2010

The Perfect Couple

Definitely one of the longer ones I wrote. You may want to read it in two sittings I just didn't want to split this one. It was inspired on my parents but now I add mi chica and I to this.

Just the other day “mi chica” sent me one of many chain emails. When you get so many of them as often as I do it gets old, even if they are inspirational, but the other day she sent me one that caught my attention. I am not superstitious, never was, never been, and hopefully never will be, so I tell a lot of you that when I get these chain emails I am the end of the line for many of them, but there are a few that I will pass along. So then, “mi chica” sent me the following text. I think it’s worth keeping as a reminder of what we should be focusing on. Just like I previously quoted that Mexican saying “Nadie sabe lo que tiene hasta que lo ve perdido” and used the Garth Brooks’ song “If Tomorrow Never Comes” now use the following as food for thought.

Don’t ever leave the one you love for the one you like
Because the one you like will leave you for the one they love
Tonight your true love will realize
How much they love between 1 and 4 in the morning
Tomorrow the shock of your life will occur
Remember, you have only one life to live
So live it with the one you love

We all have role models, we all look up to someone for guidance, once I was the rookie, and so I too needed my role model. I didn’t have too look too far, all I had to do was look at my mom and dad, for me the greatest role models of all times. Talk about the perfect couple, the one that survived many hardships against all odds and surfaced victorious. The one that never claimed perfection but always strived for it. The one that had no weak links and altered their ways to accommodate each other. One strong woman and one supportive man and the architects of what we are today. My mom thought me a phrase at an early age that said, “cuando la prudencia no quepa en uno, que quepa en el otro”, live by this and you’ll see that many bad times will be eliminated. So, where my parents perfect? Is my mom perfect? Probably not, but they are the closest I know that comes close to it. All their life they had shown us to do the right thing, not just with words but also with their actions, and they always practiced what they preached. I’ll agree with many of you in saying that no, my mom is not perfect, but to me she is, she always was, and forever will be perfect… because she is my mom. One love, one life, it definitely worked for them, and as they are my role models and the ones I have always looked up to I know now and without a doubt that one love, one life will work for me.

Clint Black and Lisa Hartman Black sang the song “When I said I do” in one of the Oprah shows and I liked it a lot but never had it in any of my collections, until now.

These times are troubled, and these times are good
And they’re always going to be, they rise and they fall.
We take them all the way that we should.
Together you and me, forsaking them all.
Deep in the night and by the light of day.
It always looks the same, true love always does.
Here by your side, or a million miles away.
Nothing’s ever gonna change the way I feel,
The way it is, is the way that it was.

When I said I do, I meant that I will, ‘til the end of all time.
Be faithful and true, devoted to you. That’s what I had in mind.
When I said I do.

This old world keeps changin’
And the world stays the same. For all who came before,
And it goes hand in hand.
Only you and I can undo all that we became,
That makes us so much more, (so much more),
Than a woman and a man.
And after everything that comes and goes around.
Has only passed us by, here alone in our dreams.
I know there’s a lonely heart in every lost and found.
But forever you and I will be the ones,
Who found out what forever means.

When I said I do, I meant that I will, ‘til the end of all time.
Be faithful and true, devoted to you.
That’s what I had in mind. When I said I do.

Truer than true
You know that I will always be there for you
That’s what I had in mind.
That’s what I had in mind.
When I said, I do.

Life’s a dance you learn as you go, my parents were not good dancers, matter of fact they weren’t dancers at all, but boy oh boy just because they couldn’t dance it didn’t stop them from teaching us a thing or two, it takes two to Tango and this they knew. They always made the right choices for them, and always were ready to help their rookies. When it comes to lemonade my mom still makes it with fresh lemons and she’ll squeeze them right there in front of you. If life or you give her lemons, she will make lemonade and not a lemon will be wasted. They were always on top of what was going on. Just like at her friend’s wedding my mom knew how many people were in attendance as she said “hay que estar en todo” you can trust me when I say that she knows anything and everything about us, you may think you fool her by keeping things from her but I can tell you different.

Mi chica always tell our kids “cuando tu vas, yo ya vengo”, well that has always applied for us too, because “cuando nosotros vamos, ella ya hasta llego”. I just hope that God keeps giving me the wisdom to continue living this life with “mi chica” like we have these past years. Remember the Spanish saying “No hay mal que por bien no venga”, that has definitely proven to be very true for us, and when it came to role models as far as I’m concerned my parents were second to none.

So then all I want to tell “mi chica” is, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la laaaaaaaa because if you know a little bit about oldies la, la, la means I LOVE YOU. And since I love you then you are a keeper. The first day of this year out of the blue you told me that you like me, and I know that you love me, soooo… I say you are pretty much stuck with me for the duration. – You think!

I know that for my parents reaching their 50th Wedding Anniversary and having all of us together to celebrate it with them was one of their most memorable milestones. As we traveled to Las Vegas one day the topic of conversation the whole way up there was making plans for their party and you could tell by my dad’s comments how much he was looking forward to the celebration. He remembered how for his mom and dad they came so close to reaching their 50 years as a married couple, but it was not to be and the knowledge that his was just around the corner was one of his biggest satisfactions, I know that he felt a sense of accomplishment because he knew what he and my mom had built from the ground up and he was extremely satisfied with what they had built and accomplished up to that point. Yes, to me they were the perfect couple; one that I feel had set the standard by which I want to live my life with my wife. Their example continues to be my guideline and I just hope that I have made them proud.

I have said it before that when my father left us I felt at peace, I had the best relationship a son can have with his father and he continues to be with me in my heart every single day of my life but in the dream world wouldn’t you want that one more chance with him?

If I could get another chance, another walk, another dance with him
I’d play a song that would never, ever end.
How I’d love, love, love
To dance with my father again.

-Dance With my Father Again
Luther Vandross

Now I’m getting that chance with my mom and I do not intend to waste it. This last year and a half, I have come to know what my mom is all about and I found out more things about them in this short time than I had learned in my entire life. If you guys give her the time and listen to her stories you will be as amazed as I have been. What a life, what dedication and determination. (Ella tan Chiquita. De donde saca para tanto?)
Now it’s time for me to reflect on our upcoming 25th Wedding Anniversary and I too look back and see what we have accomplished or have not, and then look forward and see where I want to be. I too want to be that perfect guy for “mi chica” so that she doesn’t get tired of me and dump me. Because I’m using my parents as my guideline I hope to see our 50th as well, weather it’ll happen we don’t know but the dream, the hope, and the ‘ganas” are there.

I will let Dolly Parton close this episode with one of her many hits, this is one that fits what I just wrote:

Baby, when I met you there was peace unknown
I set out to get you with a fine tooth comb
I was soft inside, there was somethin' going on
You do something to me that I can't explain
Hold me closer and I feel no pain
Every beat of my heart
We got somethin' goin' on
Tender love is blind
It requires a dedication
All this love we feel
Needs no conversation
We ride it together, ah-ah
Makin' love with each other, ah-ah
Islands in the stream
That is what we are
No one in-between
How can we be wrong
Sail away with me to another world
And we rely on each other, ah-ah
From one lover to another, ah-ah
I can't live without you if the love was gone
Everything is nothin' if you got no one
And you did walk in tonight
Slowly loosen' sight of the real thing
But that won't happen to us and we got no doubt
Too deep in love and we got no way out
And the message is clear
This could be the year for the real thing
No more will you cry
Baby, I will hurt you never
We start and end as one, in love forever
We can ride it together, ah-ah
Makin' love with each other, ah-ah

One Life One Love -- Until Death do Us Part.



MrManuel said...

No couple is perfect, although, it is flattering how our friends talk about our marriage and tell us how perfect it seems, even if we have only been married 7 years. I am glad you had such good role models of how marriage should be like your parents. From the outside, your marriage seemed just as perfect and inspiring.

Chely said...

All I can say is...you've made me cry.

Anonymous said...

Love your post today. Jose.

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