Sunday, January 17, 2010

The Perfect Couple

Here is another excerpt from Life's a Dance. This was written after we attended a wedding my mom got invited to and we had one of the best times of our lives.

We had the opportunity to attend the wedding of a couple we didn’t even know. As we enter the church you really could see how much thought was put into this wedding and into the celebration as a whole. Every end of each pew had a ribbon and a bow. A harp was played as we waited for the celebration to begin, and the sound it emitted was very beautiful. As the procession started a trio of kids played the Wedding March and even though at times they were way off tune I don’t think that the bride and groom or the people attending the ceremony cared. In that particular moment it just didn’t matter, the sound was special never the less. Every female in the procession held a beautiful bouquet of yellow roses. The bride being Mexican and the groom Caucasian, a bilingual mass was prepared complete with what seemed to be the church’s choir singing both in English and Spanish and while the couple offered the bouquet of flowers to the Virgin Mary, a soloist sang a most beautiful rendition of the Ave Maria. (I think it’s safe to say we all got goose bumps) “How can some people think that getting married is not important enough?” is what I asked my wife as we just sat there absorbing the whole thing. We certainly have been to lots of weddings, that by no means was the first one or the most beautiful one, however there was a certain thing in that wedding that to me was special, the couple getting married were not young anymore, were they old? Not really but let’s say that their teen years were left behind a long time ago. I couldn’t help but think that this couple may not have a chance to celebrate a Silver Anniversary so maybe they’ll celebrate each and every anniversary with a different passion than most.

Now, here we are “mi chica” and I get the chance to see the first 25 years go swooshing over our heads because to me it feels as if it was yesterday when we said, “I do”. As we exchanged comments we both realize that we have in fact traveled over a bumpy road full of ups and downs and through it all we have made the necessary adjustments needed to continue on our journey. Some of the things that we encountered while on that road were:

Our kids came first – Yes they did, heck to a certain point they still do. Once a parent always a parent, the key here was and still is that once they went to sleep they did not exist until the following day, the night was ours to use as we may. One bed for two of us, never one bed for two of us and three of them.

Get a life – Hobbies and things to do when I’m with you. Weather it was the CB radio and the endless parties known to us as “convivios”, or Salsa dancing every Wednesday night, or joining a car or motorcycle club and riding together or the wonderful weekend getaways we used to have to Solvang, we always made sure we had time for us and I mean just us. Yes our kids came first but that’s why every so often we had to leave them behind.

Ours jobs – No doubt having a good reliable job is of great importance, thanks to my job I have a roof over our heads and food to put on the table, can’t neglect it, can’t put it aside, after all we spend more of our awake time there than at home. However my job can not and will not ever be the most important part of my life. I can replace a job with no problem whatsoever, but my family is irreplaceable, therefore making family my number one priority.

Have your fights once in a while – Because it’s so worth it making up. There’s just no two ways about it every now and then we will disagree. What? You didn’t expect for everything to be perfect, did you? I didn’t think so. An since It Takes Two to Tango, make sure your spouse is taken care of first and foremost, otherwise you’ll be tangoing by yourself and all the sub-important things above mentioned won’t seem as important any more.

Learn to say “I’m sorry” – Even though sorry seems to be the hardest word. It is also one we don’t say either soon or often enough. Just make sure you mean it when you say it. If you mean it but don’t say it, it’s no good, if you say it but don’t mean it, it’s no good either, so do a soul search and do the right thing. In the end it will pay you huge dividends if you do.




Nikki said...


Chely said...

I remember reading this before but only up to your narration of the wedding. The last part is new to me.

But so true=)

ChrisJ said...

Really good advice Jose!.

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